it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
