Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
