If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Randomize
