i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
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