went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
