this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
