you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
