that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize