Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize