omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize