Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
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He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
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I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃