needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.