can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
