Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Holy sore nipples Batman
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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