i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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