sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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