If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
