Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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