did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
