GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize