Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
The adults are the big ones right?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
