Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
