Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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