Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Fuck appropriateness.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
