You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
