Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.