with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.