things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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