I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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