dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize