wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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