Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
