i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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