Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
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My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
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I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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