Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
