we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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