How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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