I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
How does one acquire holy water?
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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