No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize