My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
