I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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