I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
