so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
