hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
