This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Swine flu is the new snow day.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
