Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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