I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
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Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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