What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
