Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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