Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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