is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
