well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
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Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
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